On the spectrum of risky to reliable relationships with dating a coworker on the risky end and the friendship with your bestie on the reliable end, a bestie is by far the greatest. However, if you start to have feeling for your best friend, it moves to the risky side rather quickly. On one hand, it could be the perfect situation because you already know each other well, but if you break up then who is there to help you through? Keep yourself sane in this situation by following the tips below.
Consider Their Relationship Status
You know your bestie’s relationship status, even if it is confusing or a secret crush. This is what best friends share. Take note of their status, whether totally free, tied down, or somewhere in between, before delving into something more than friend territory.
Respect Their Status
Since you already know your friend’s relationship status, whether committed or in the midst of a break up, respect that status. It can be tempting to tell them how amazing they are and use the situation to your advantage, but hold off on sharing anything.
Differentiate Feelings
There is a difference in platonic and romantic feelings. If you have started having feelings beyond friendship, make sure they are actually attraction and not just a deep sense of love for a friend. Being friends mean you already care about that person more than the average, so do a self-assessment to ensure the feelings really are romantic before you act on anything.
Let Guilt Go
Once you have established that the feelings really are romantic, allow yourself to feel them guilt free. You have no control over what you feel, just what you choose to do about it.
Weigh the Options
The hardest part about having romantic feelings for your best friend is the fear that if things do not work out, you lose the friendship. If you tell them and it doesn’t work, then the friendship is forever changed. If you choose not to say anything, you face the burden of your feelings and will never know what could develop if you had said something. Choose which will stress you the least, knowing something is going to change.
Stick to the Plan
Once you choose what to do, accept that decision fully and commit. If you decide to share the feelings, believe that your friendship will survive because they are your best friend. Things may be awkward for a while if they do not have similar feelings, but if they do then the payoff will be immense. The best love stories begin with friendship after all.
