When you date someone, you want them to love your family and your friends. If your partner is getting along with your family but there is a conflict between your partner and your best friend, what do you do? These are two people that are very important in your life. You want them to get along with each other and you love them both very much but that doesn’t always work how you want it to.
Sometimes when your partner doesn’t get along with your best friend there can be a conflict here. Your best friend has more than likely been around for a lot longer than your partner has and even if you are married or have kids together, this can cause there to be even more problems.
Maybe your partner feels that your best friend is taking over their life even if you have known them for years. What if your partner hates your best friend and doesn’t want them in your life? Here are some things that you need to figure out:
Controlling
Some people do not like someone because they want to be controlling. If your partner is not open minded and respectful, this can be a problem. You need to have a partner with an open mind and just because you have a best friend it doesn’t mean that your best friend is trying to steal their position.
Pay attention to what is causing your partner to have an issue and see if he just dislikes them or if there is a real reason. When your partner feels threatened, it can be that he has issues and is over possessive of you.
If you feel that this is the issue, chances are that you might have a relationship situation that needs to be fixed.
You can tell this if your partner is taken by your best friend and if they are frustrated when they are around. If they seem to react bigger or a rude to your best friend, you need to have a conversation with them about your freedom and about respect.
Point of View
Take time to try to see things from both your partners and your best friends point of view. You will love them both. Maybe you have a best friend that is hard to deal with and you love them one minute but then the next they are driving you crazy. You might even feel that your best friend has let you down.
All of the things that you feel might be the feelings that your partner is feeling. You need to understand their point of view. It is hard to see someone that you love being mistreated and even if you aren’t upset at your best friend anymore, your partner might still be mad at them for hurting you.
This might be especially true if you are one that vents to your partner about people. It can cause them to forget the good parts of you having a best friend. Show your partner that you love your best friend and find new ways to deal with your frustration with them.
Talk to your best friend about what is causing you to be aggravated with them. Explain to them that your partner might be different around them because your partner is backward or because your partner has a hard time letting new people in. Talking can make a huge difference.
Boundaries
If your partner doesn’t like your best friend, you will still want to spend time with them, and your partner needs to be good to you. They need to be reasoning and allow you to spend time with your friend.
This doesn’t mean that you need to have your best friend around all the time but if you want to do a girl’s night or hang out with your best friend, explain to your partner why this is important to you and why they need to get along with them. This should be done out of respect for you.
All of your friends and you could get together once a month and go on a vacation or a short trip. This can get them to learn to know each other better and feel more comfortable around each other.
It would be a perfect world if your best friend and your partner could get along together but this doesn’t always work out that way. Try to understand why one of them have an issue and figure out if they are just shy or backward.
Do not let your partner feel intimidated by our best friend or to try to control you but find a middle ground. They don’t have to love your best friend like you do but they need to be good to you and respectful of what you want in your life.
