Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You Back

Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You Back

We all face the possibility of being heartbroken, this comes will all relationships.  When this happens, you have to learn to move on.  When you love someone and they don’t love you back, you can learn to deal with this, and it will be okay.

A Friend

When you have a friend that you have more than just friendship feelings for, you have to learn to talk about it and get over thee feelings.  If someone is showing you that they love you and you don’t feel the same, its time to talk about it.

When you can talk about how you feel, it can help people get over things.  Hiding your feelings can end up ruining the friendship and cause harsh feelings between you.

Meet together and talk about what you feel and don’t blame each other. Just be open and clear.

They don’t need to tell you why they love you, but just identify the things that are causing these feelings and why things are a bit confusing.

Make sure you are honest and don’t give false hope if you don’t feel the same, just be kind.  Once you have cleared this out, you will feel awkward, possibly, so make a joke to lighten the mood.  Make light out of it so you can stay friends.

Boundaries

Once this happens, you have to learn to set boundaries.  That way, you won’t feel bad about your actions and how they are reacting to them.

Set boundaries without limiting your contact because you want to stay friends with this person.  Suggest that you see each other less and that you don’t talk on the phone or text as much.

Don’t cut them out completely, just cut them out enough that you can learn to love them just as a friend.  Don’t let things become confusing or have blurry lines, take things for what they are.

Advantage

Sometimes when you are with someone that likes you, even if you don’t like them back, the attention is nice, and you might get used to it and like it.

It can be easy to use someone accidently if they like you.  They might bring you more things and do more for you and go the extra step in order to make you feel good about yourself.

Make sure that you don’t expect them to go out of their way for you when you are only wanting to be a friend with them.  This can make you take advantage of them and you don’t want to do that.

Be Careful What You Say

Make sure when you talk to this person that you are not being dramatic.  You don’t want to change your friendship and you want to keep being kind and compassionate.  Do not be rude to them or hurt them because they like you.

Reflect on Your Life

Take time to reflect on your friendship and know that they might be a little sad or upset with you.  You have to know that you are aware that they like you and still be outgoing and fun to be around.  Don’t compromise who you are because you feel bad.

You should make sure that you monitor what you do and that you are appropriate around them.  Don’t touch and be feely with them because it will make them have more feelings.

Take what they say and do some compromises so that you can enjoy each other and not have to stop being friends.  Reflect on what may have caused these feelings and be okay to change some.

If This Doesn’t Work

If that doesn’t work and you are upset or they are upset with you, still be kind.

You have to come to a point where you have to put your foot down since you made it clear that you don’t feel the same.  Do not let them push the boundaries.

It is important to let go of a relationship that becomes toxic and this friendship can be one thing you have to let go of.  It is not your fault that you do not feel for them the same that they do, and you shouldn’t have to pretend that you do.

If you have already set boundaries and they are not working, warn them and limit how many times you will do this.  Be fair and give them time to adjust but demand that they treat you as a friend and only as a friend.

If you feel this cannot happen, take a break from them and give each other space.  Your time apart can let you spend time with other people.

Being in a Relationship

When you have been seeing someone and you don’t feel love for them, then one day they tell you that they love you, it can make you feel weird and awkward.  What should you say and what do you feel?

Don’t lie to them or tell them that you love them when you are not sure.  Thank them and tell them that you appreciate that they love you.

Be honest with them and tell them that you enjoy them and want to see how the relationship goes.  Once that happens, ask yourself some inner questions such as:

Future

Do you want to spend your future with them?

In How Long?

When do you feel that you are going to be ready to move more into the relationship?

If the relationship is early, you need to not rush, but if it has been a while, you need to understand why you are not feeling strong for this person.

Have You Been Hurt?

If you have been hurt in the past, chances are you are not letting your heart open to love again and this could be why the relationship is not moving forward.

Love

Do you have a hard time knowing what love is?  Do you think and feel that love should feel different?  Do you want something like a hopeless romantic love, and this is not what you want?

Maybe you feel that you are in love with this person, but you don’t know it because you don’t really know what love feels like.

Maybe you are infatuated with someone and the idea of becoming more serious is scary.

Forcing It

Do not try to force love.  You can have feelings, but you need to make sure that you do not try to force things to move forward.

Be Kind

Your partner needs to not force it and be annoyed at you.  It is not a time to freak out and to make things awkward in the relationship.  There has to be time to figure out what everyone wants.

It is not a big deal and the last thing that you want is to stop the relationship before you have a chance to know if it is mean to be or not.

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