Many people believe that our past can determine how well we function in our relationships. If you are one of the people that do not believe this, you are not the only one. Some individuals believe that things in the past should stay in the past and that they have nothing to do with the present or the future.
It is important that someone does not get stuck from things in the past but knowing what has happened in the past is important because emotional wounds can put obstacles in your relationships.
These are a list of emotional wounds that you may have faced in your past:
- Physical abuse
- Emotional problems.
- Absence of parents in life.
- Levels of abuse or criticism.
- Loss of friendships.
- Loss of love.
- Mistreatment in relationships.
There are different ways that people can have pain that stays with them in their life. Some people will be vulnerable to these situations but when someone has had these experiences in their early life or childhood, the more likely they will struggle with their relationships as adults.
Here are some wounds that can show up if you get into a relationship:
- Attracting partners that are abusive.
- Attract partners that are not emotionally available to you.
- Sabotage your own relationships.
- Expect people to be things they are not.
- Be disappointed easily in relationships.
One reason that all these things happen is because people that have been hurt in the past will likely have wounds in their life where they feel that they are not worthy and they feel that they are not good enough. They have no idea that they can have a real and happy relationship because they have learned the opposite.
Children who spent their life without love and security developed these opinions and as they became adults, they believed what happened to them as children would happen to them in their future as well. The way that we believe things and how we cope with things is the way that we live our lives. We come to the point where our brain shows us how we should react to difficult things.
When we have unhealthy relationships, we can look at our past and see how it has stopped us from being happy in our lives. We feel that we do not deserve to be in good relationships and so we go for relationships that are toxic or abusive and ones that bring us pain.
The good thing is that we can change this, and we can learn to steer away from abuse and towards positive relationships in our life.
We can learn to get past our struggles and the past that we have lived and change our lives so we can have peace and better intimacy with people.
We have to learn from our past, but we also have to learn to move forward in our life. When you can move forward, you can reward yourself with happiness and love.